Your submissive journey is also a path to self-discovery. In this category, you’ll find resources and reflections to help you grow emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
Full Question: How can I be a bratty submissive so that my Dom enjoys it without losing my submissiveness? Answer: Being a bratty submissive can be a challenge! Brattiness has a broad spectrum from the playful “uppity bottom” to the smart-ass masochist. A brat is a bottom who enjoys struggling against control or challenging the […]
How can I be bratty and submissive? Read More »
Full Question: Can a little be a slave? How would this dynamic look different from a “normal” m/s dynamic? How would it look the same? Answer: Yes! This answer is for any submissive role, so if you aren’t a little or a slave you will hopefully learn a bit more about roles in BDSM. Roles
Can a little be a slave? Read More »
Question: As someone with anxiety, what are some good ways I can try to emotionally regulate myself when having strong feelings, so I don’t have to burden my Dominant with them all the time? Answer: According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), over 40 million people have anxiety in the US. That’s
How can I regulate my anxiety, so I don’t burden my Dominant? Read More »
As a slave, I am responsible for certain activities within the house. I cook, clean, and am otherwise generally responsible for maintaining the household in ways that do not require professional repair. So, while I’m not expected to perform plumbing or electrical work, I might be required to repaint walls or maintain the garden. One
Learn to Accept Your Limitations: A Personal Lesson on Teamwork In The Dynamic Read More »
Through the previous articles in this series, you’ll have learned how to build your personal values and how to let go of your past, including your past mistakes. Learning from failure is a skill that, while difficult, can have longstanding benefits. Many submissives, myself included, get stuck on failure, wear them around our neck with
Solo-Coaching: Learning From Failure – It’s A Good Thing Read More »
Let’s face it: there is nothing sexy about flying off the handle. As submissives, we are used to a certain degree of control in our lives. But how much of that is exerted over our emotions? Do we give ourselves credit for the amount of power we have to improve ourselves by exercising moderation in
Emotional Moderation in Submission: Choose Your Emotions Wisely Read More »
If I asked you right now to stop and say aloud all the things you wanted, what would you list? A new home, a new car, more money, set up your own business, a relationship or a new job? Sound familiar? It’s really easy to list off wants and desires. We often make plans to
Solo-Coaching: Identifying Unmet Needs and How to Reprioritize Them In Your Life Read More »
As a submissive, we are often bombarded with people telling us that we have to know our wants and needs; from when we first start out, to when we find a relationship, from when we start struggling with this or that, to exploring something new. Wants and needs are quite important. But what’s also important
One of the most daunting things we do in our life is knowing you want to change or need to change. We all aspire to improve our lives and wish to take on the challenge to make those changes, but quickly we’ll realize that motivation is the key to that change. You can’t become a
Solo-Coaching: Three Key Elements to Fire Your Motivation for Change as a Submissive Read More »
It’s very easy to get overwhelmed and have far too much to do with what feels like no time to do it. I’ve also been caught up with waiting until the last moment to do something when I knew about it for a lot longer. That pressure is not healthy! But there are steps we
Solo-Coaching: Prioritize Your Submissive Goals With a 4-Box Matrix System Read More »
Writing a letter to your future self is a common journaling practice to help you see how happy you are in the present moment, but the writing a letter to your past self is equally helpful. While you can’t save this for you to read later, the exercise is still beneficial, especially if you’re feeling
Why Writing a Letter To Your Past Self Will Help You When Your Struggling in Submission Read More »
I think we’ve all done it. We’ve set a goal for ourselves or we have a big project that we want to accomplish and then, within a few weeks or months we feel overwhelmed with the whole thing and want to give up. So, we set that goal again later that year because we’d really
Don’t Let Your Big Goals Intimidate You: Break Them Into Smaller Steps Read More »
The last time we were doing some solo-coaching here on Submissive Guide we had just gotten started trying to learn what coaching is and how to hold meetings with yourself, journal your thoughts and understand your current goals. I even bundled it up into an ebook if you want the whole first series. Solo Coaching
Are You Ready for More Solo-Coaching? Check Out Where Your Journey Will Progress Next! Read More »
I was failing as a submissive. Something in me had broken and that magical, powerful feeling that submission was once giving me was gone. I didn’t want to believe that I wasn’t submissive anymore but every single clue was that something was wrong with my emotional wellbeing, and my happiness was clouded by the depression
Feeling Like a Failure – The Crash and Burn of a Slave: A Personal Story Read More »
This is a guest post by Bibi for the Day in the Life Series. Interested in sharing what a day in your life looks like? Email it to me! My name is Bibi. I am a Full-time Slave to Master Jimmy, and this is a day in my life. I am not a youngster and am
A Day in the Life of a Submissive – Bibi Read More »
Sometimes, even though you try your hardest, that spark of submission fades. Whether that be from stress, relationship issues, a death in the family or some other upheaval there may come a time when you feel yourself fighting submission, arguing with every request and pushing against your Dominant at every turn. You may even just
Feeling Submissive Again After a Break – How I Am Reclaiming Myself Read More »
There are many relationships both inside and outside of the Lifestyle that exist under undue strain and eventually crumble under the weight of the behaviors that are a result of self-sabotage, and all too often these habitual patterns aren’t recognized though they are repeated with great frequency. A cycle of strife is perpetuated year in
Uprooting Self-Sabotaging Behaviors: Learning How to Make Changes that Stick Read More »
The other day, I was getting ready to run some errands with Daddy. I was sitting on my side of the bed when I dropped something. When I bent forwards to pick it up, I found a small box underneath the bed. I had no clue what was in the box, so I picked it
The Importance of Self-Acceptance When You Are a Little Read More »
When an individual enters a relationship, it’s quite easy to lose yourself. You start using ‘we’ instead. “We” liked the movie, “We didn’t like the restaurant” and of course, there’s all those love songs about two becoming one (I am so sorry if the Spice Girls song 2 Becomes 1 is now stuck in your
Remember Who You Are – Staying True to Yourself in a D/s Relationship Read More »
The other day in a female submissives only group I help run on Facebook, I posted a link that talked about what things were expected of a 1950’s housewife. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen this and it probably won’t be the last. This is one of those things that tend to pop up on
Stop Sub Shaming: It’s Not Cool to be Judgy Read More »
