personal development Archives

Are You Ready for More Solo-Coaching? Check Out Where Your Journey Will Progress Next!

By lunaKM / 4 minutes of reading

The last time we were doing some solo-coaching here on Submissive Guide we had just gotten started trying to learn what coaching is and how to hold meetings with yourself, journal your thoughts and understand your current goals. I even bundled it up into an ebook if you want the whole first series. Solo Coaching […]

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Solo-Coaching – Tearing Down Old Defensive Behaviors

By lunaKM / 5 minutes of reading

We’ve all probably uttered this phrase a time or two when having a heated conversation with a loved one, “you’re becoming defensive.” From the time we are born, we learn defensive mechanisms that are meant to protect us from pain and trauma. A child’s first defense is to cry, and they tend to cry a

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Creating Realistic Submissive Goals Sets You Up for Success

By pinksubgeek / 5 minutes of reading

Last year I wrote about the importance of revising your contracts at the start of the New Year so you can make sure that it reflects your current relationship parameters and hard/soft limits. I’m still a single submissive, and (for the time being) I’m enjoying this journey of self-discovery and self-improvement. One thing that single submissives must always remember is

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Working to Develop Personal Rituals

By lunaKM / 4 minutes of reading

This entry is part 32 of 35 in the series Rituals, Rules and Protocol

Every single day I perform rituals that I’ve created to help me feel connected to my submission even if I’m not in the mood or feeling in the right mindset. They are especially helpful during times of stress and busy life when the D/s may seem pushed back so that other pressing matters can be

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The Secret to Better Submission Every Day

By lunaKM / 4 minutes of reading

This entry is part 27 of 30 in the series Novice Submissives Start Here

Want to know a secret? Submission gets better every day. What makes it so good? I’m not going to tell you any revelations that you probably don’t already know. But here goes. Your personal investment in your future is what makes it better every day. The fact that you follow Submissive Guide to learn and

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Solo Coaching – Ask Yourself the Right Questions

By lunaKM / 3 minutes of reading

It may not be clear to others by now but I’m pretty good at asking myself questions and asking questions for reflection with others. It’s how much of the topics I write come to be. I ask myself a question and then try to answer it. It’s an art that I’ve had to learn because

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The Importance of Taking Your Time Exploring Submission Before Starting a Relationship

By lunaKM / 3 minutes of reading

One thing I have learned from my experience as a submissive and my encounters with submissives and slaves all over the place has been the importance of taking things slowly. At one time or another, we all tend to rashly jump into a D/s relationship without really knowing the Dominant that we are surrendering to.

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Learning Good Observation Skills for Better Submissive Awareness

By lunaKM / 8 minutes of reading

When I started my journey into submission, my perceptions of what a submissive was were very shallow and incomplete. I believed being submissive was a passive personality trait, and it didn’t require much ‘work.’ That passivity encouraged the laziness I had fostered in my previous marriage. Now, I’m far more aware that a submissive is

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Setting Realistic Goals to Realize Your Dreams

By lunaKM / 6 minutes of reading

Every year many people sit down and make a long list of resolutions they’d like to accomplish in the coming year. It’s a grand idea and one that I tend to participate in every other year or so. But the downfall of this sort of plan is in the timing. You may not be ready

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Creating a Personal Submissive Protocol

By lunaKM / 5 minutes of reading

This entry is part 3 of 35 in the series Rituals, Rules and Protocol

Protocol. It’s a word that is used in BDSM groups online and off with a sort of secrecy and awe. It’s relegated to those in 24/7 type relationships and rarely discussed as what it really is. Protocol is a defined set of rules and behaviors for special situations. That’s it. You don’t have to be in any

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Accepting 24/7 D/s as a Real Relationship Style

By lunaKM / 3 minutes of reading

Part of the typical criticism of D/s full-time is that it can’t be real. No one can live 24/7 D/s. I hear it a lot. These people say that life gets in the way and you can’t be Dominant and submissive all the time. The people that say they can’t lead a 24/7 life always

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How to Document Your Skills and Training in your Submissive Resume

By lunaKM / 2 minutes of reading

This entry is part 2 of 11 in the series The Submissive Resume

Your Training Resume is a folder or binder with all of your training, history, and experience in it so that you can give it to a prospective Dominant or keep a training history for yourself. It’s a novel concept for submissives and one that I’ve not seen so far. Part of the Resume is to

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