Whether you’re brand new to this thing we call BDSM (especially Dominance and submission) or you’ve been around a while, no doubt you’ve heard a few things that make you go, “Hmmmm? Really?” Today, let’s talk about the different myths surrounding submissives and submission. Some may surprise you. Myth 1: Submissives are weak. Take it
Want to be a better submissive? Start with these 10 simple tips to improve your submission and service in your D/s dynamic. Practical, easy-to-follow advice for all levels!
A few months ago I started a list of things you can do to improve your submission immediately. If you want to see what’s on that list, you can find that post in the archives. I’d like to continue to add to that list because there are always things you can do but may not see
So, you want me to tell you how you can tell if you are submissive or not? Asking someone else if you are submissive is like asking a blind man what color your dress is. Is there some magical online quiz that can say whether you are submissive or slave? Unfortunately no and I don’t
As a novice submissive it can be an exciting endeavor to enter into a relationship right away before you know anything about BDSM or D/s, or even being introduced to the dynamic from someone you met online or face to face. People do it every day. It is also one filled with questions and uncertainty
Not everyone is capable of being submissive. It is even possible that you are not really cut out for it. We all have different thresholds for what we can and can’t do, but realizing we can’t be submissive isn’t the end of the world. Great, so how do you know if you can be submissive
One of the many unique things about being a submissive is that you can focus your development any which way you choose. You can focus on service or sex, kinky play or happy devotion. Your submission can be part time, full time or somewhere in-between. No one should judge you for how you want to
Mollena Williams, a well-known and respected speaker, educator, and Ms. Leather 2010, has inspired my submission more than she will probably ever know. One of my favorite messages she conveys is that the submissive’s prime directive (affiliate link) is to take care of the property. The meaning can apply to many things in a submissive’s journey, but
Like anyone else who’s walking the submissive path, I struggle from time to time. Maybe more times than I really care to admit. There are times where Daddy asks things of me, that I don’t quite want to do or I feel like I don’t have a submissive bone in my body and that makes
There is no way to be sure but, the large majority of information about the D/s lifestyle is in fiction form. While it’s nice to escape into emotional and physical stories, they are fantasy. For submissives looking to get their feet wet, these stories could hinder or harm the very ideas that develop in the
The many lessons in life can be picked up in some of the most unusual places. The other day I was watching my cats and had a sudden realization that they way they live could have lessons for me and my submission if I wanted to see them. The truth is that you can pick
Discovering your submissive nature isn’t always a sudden process. For many people, it takes some soul searching to see that you may enjoy being a people-pleaser or that when someone asks you to do something you happily do it without a second thought. For others, it takes some social reprogramming to allow your full nature
I was never formally introduced to the bdsm world but I have always found the thought of being controlled a extreme turn on. How do I know if being a submissive is the right thing for me? And if it is, what is the best way to go about entering the lifestyle? Dear Never Formally
What ARE you expected to do and know as a submissive? Well, for many who are just starting out, the answer really is not much. But that’s not the kind of answer you accept out of me, right? There’s more to it, isn’t there? Of course there always is, but you have to begin somewhere
I went to a local kink event and as an icebreaker, the host asked everyone to say what kind of animal they relate to. When I said I relate to a lioness, I got a ton of strange looks. I suppose it makes sense. As a submissive, it might not seem like I’d relate to
I love surfing the submissive blogs to see what other people are talking about. Many times it gives me something to talk about here on this site. This post is one such example. Over on Underhishand.com, kaya asked about submission and what qualifies it as submission. She asked, “if you are not expected to do
Oftentimes, the first lines of an email to me or an opening thread in a discussion group go something like this; “I’m new and am nervous to ask these silly questions so be nice to me.” “I’m really embarrassed to ask since I’m so new, but…” “I’m new to the lifestyle and overwhelmed with all
When you’re a brand new BDSM submissive, it can be hard to find information to answer the many questions in your mind. To help you, I’ve gathered seven of the best books to help get you started on your exploration of BDSM and the submissive role. These books offer a range of opinions and viewpoints
Submission has been called a gift. It has been said to be a natural characteristic. Submission is also a choice. When I first entered the lifestyle, no one would have mistaken me for a submissive. I am strong willed, commanding and independent. I have a dominant personality. Nature, society and the way I was brought
I’ve been writing about submission here for a long time. I do my best to give a positive image to submission for those who are new and learning about BDSM and possibly wanting to explore it with their current of future partners. There’s nothing wrong with the way I write and have been prompted on
