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Everything You Need to Know About Being Kinky

“Are you kinky?” he asked as he leaned in for a kiss. “What? Um… no, I don’t think so. Am I?” The word kinky is not exactly a clear term to define. It is a word that means different things depending on the context but maybe we can come up with a basic definition and

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What Is BDSM All About?

It’s been awhile since I’ve done a refresher on the basics of BDSM. If you are just finding this site, I hope that the wealth of information you see will help you understand yourself and the world in which you are curious. For novices, the word BDSM is a huge scary word. For the experienced,

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Getting Started At the Kinky Buffet

I will never forget the feeling of “coming home” when I opened the door to BDSM. My whole being was able to relax knowing I was submissive and that I was not the only one. I was also excited beyond belief and felt like I had so much to learn about this new side of

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7 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was New to BDSM

As a submissive, I was a newbie once. When I entered the lifestyle, I was excited and cautious after learning there was a term for the kinky ideas in my head. It was overwhelming—I wanted to dive into everything at once. Thankfully, a kind Dominant advised me to learn first, and I’ve never forgotten that

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The Top 3 Books I Recommend to Everyone New to BDSM

Since the late 90’s there has been an increase in the number of books available for people wanting information about BDSM and D/s style relationships. I can’t say it’s a saturated market, but it is overwhelming sometimes trying to find quality material to read that won’t leave you confused or stuck in a “this is

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Why BDSM is Not D/s

This post is by Skylerpet. She’s written several other posts here for Submissive Guide. You can read more of her work on online submission and pet play here. BDSM and D/s. Some see it as the same, I see them as two very different things. Here, I plan on explaining the how’s and why’s of my

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Those First Few Baby Steps into BDSM and Submission

Everyone has to start here. The very beginning, where all the jargon of BDSM starts to fill your mind and overwhelm your feelings. You think you are a pervert, or not normal. You could even be trying to suppress those kinky thoughts from your mind. But they keep creeping back in, don’t they. For the brave souls that start searching for

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How Do I Know What I Like? I’m Brand New

Everyone started here at some point or another. You may even be at this point right now. Brand new to BDSM, D/s or both and not sure what you would like in a relationship, the bedroom, with kink…. anything. And then you meet people online or face to face that asks you right off the

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BDSM Basics – How Do I Find Someone to Play With?

It’s the burning question on our lips now isn’t it? Through the earlier posts we’ve learned whether you are kinky, what role or roles we might enjoy and how to stay safe when exploring kink. So it makes sense that you now want to know how to find someone to experiment with and maybe have a relationship with! I’m going

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BDSM Basics: Staying Safe with SSC

In my earlier BDSM Basics videos you learned about being kinky and what roles you might like to try while you explore the great big world of BDSM. Today I’m going to talk about safety. Every new thing you try is full of risks, some you are willing to take and others you aren’t. So

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BDSM Basics: Am I Dominant or submissive?

Whether you’ve read 50 Shades of Grey or another drugstore dirty romance novel and then decided to go exploring in BDSM or you’ve found BDSM another way one of the first questions everyone has is are they Dominant or submissive? It sure feels like a good place to start and I am going to help

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BDSM Basics: Am I Kinky If…?

You’re surfing the internet one day and come across a forum of people talking about their sex lives. It’s interesting to you so you stop and read a bit. Just when you thought you were like everyone else, someone mentions something that you enjoy doing during sex and the responses are, “Oh that’s kinky!” It

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