Full Question: How do I feel connected with my Dominant the weeks we don’t see each other?
Answer:
It’s never easy to face being alone when you’d rather be spending time with your Dominant partner. Working on hobbies, hanging out with friends, and interacting with the BDSM community are great for distracting you and making time move the tiniest bit faster, but it does nothing to build connection and keep the relationship alive while they are absent. Here are things you can do to feel closer to your Dominant when they can not be with you.
Using Pen and Paper
Love Letters – Remember the art of the handwritten letter. Read their words repeatedly to remain connected and feel the love.
Journal – Having a place where you can write about your feelings and experiences while distance separates you is proven to help you feel better.
Texts/emails – It is nice to be able to talk back and forth almost simultaneously. It’s also a fantastic way to stay connected and continue the D/s dynamic.
Sacred Space
Mantras and Meditations – Having a phrase or quote connecting you to your submission and your Dominant will lift you up and connect to your partner as you speak them.
Timed Rituals – Anything that you can set your watches by can become a ritual that binds you together. This can be simple, like saying goodnight to each other out loud as you get into bed.
Talisman/Effigy – A talisman is a trinket or charm that you carry with you, like lockets of hair or worn clothing items that remind you of them.
Sexual Threads
Orgasm Control – If you have to ask permission to orgasm, you’ll have to find a way to work the control into being apart from each other. Ideas like being allowed to masturbate or orgasm at specified times, only when you receive a text/email or phone call from them.
That Special Toy – Having a special toy that can only be used under their direction is a great way to connect and fire intimacy when you can’t be together. You can use it during cyber sex or phone sex, or at timed intervals like the rituals listed above.
Erotica Shared – A simple way to connect with your Dominant is to read the same erotic novel and then talk about it together. You can even write erotica together by writing a few paragraphs and then have them write a few paragraphs and pass them back and forth, thus writing your story together.
These are just a few ideas for connecting to your Dominant while they are away. If you have any others, please add them in the comments below!