Full Question: I am a submissive sissy with a Dom Daddy that likes to give me oral pleasure but I don’t like it. When he does it reminds me of my male side and turns me off! How can I explain to him how I wish he wouldn’t do that?
Answer:
It can be hard to talk to your partner about something that means so much to them but affects you negatively. If it bothers you, you shouldn’t just accept it. Your needs are one of the most important facets of your happiness that should be fulfilled in order to continue to be happy. If you need your partner not to perform oral because it amplifies the gender you do not wish to identify with, you must speak up.
Depending on how comfortable you are talking with your partner will determine how you go about sharing this need. If you’ve always been open and they are very receptive to your needs, saying, “When you perform oral sex on me I feel more male and it turns me off. Could you not do that please?” should be enough to open up a conversation between you two.
You owe to your possible future happiness that the two (or more) of you are on the same page. This way you have less likelihood of arguments based on needs not being met, and you have a lower chance of unhappiness and failure of the relationship. Your wants and needs are just as valid as theirs are; make sure they know ’em!
“I’m still afraid of what they’ll say!”
Let’s think about this rationally for a moment. Why are you afraid of what they will say? Do you think they will think less of you? Get past those feelings. They’ve chosen you to be with and I’m certain they have the desire to make sure there is mutual fulfillment.
Don’t just go along with what they are doing because “they are the Dominant.” This is a relationship that is built on mutual trust, respect, and fulfillment. If one of you is unhappy, it’s important to express that and find a solution.