I believe the second kinky activity introduced to me after spanking was flogging. Since then I’ve had a love/love relationship with it. Flogging is when a top uses a multi-tailed whip to strike in a swinging motion, often times rhythmically. The material that the flogger is made of varies as much as the sensation. Suede is […]
Perspectives: Flogging Read More »
Insomnia is a common condition. I have seen estimates that over half of all adults experience difficulties sleeping a few nights per week or more. I am not a doctor or expert on health issues but I have found something which helps me get to sleep at night: BDSM! There are two ways I have
BDSM To Cure Insomnia? Read More »
If you can’t get out to munches in your community or conventions held around the world the next best thing is a website focused on kink education. I have nothing but praise for Kink Academy and the quality educators and topics that they cover on Kink Academy. Here at Submissive Guide I have talked about Kink
Fantastic Submissive Videos for Learning and Growth on Kink Academy Read More »
The last post in this series is not about speech but how we say things that speak a lot about our mood, impression of the situation and so much more – our tone. The tone is also something precarious because you can be misunderstood by your tone alone. How many times have you had to
Lessons in Submissive Speech 12: Don’t Use That Tone With Me Read More »
If you get 2 submissives in a room together and it’s very likely that a discussion will take place about their Dominant partners. We sure love to talk about them, don’t we? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve talked about KnyghtMare at the Submissive Forum. It’s usually with pride and love that he
Lessons in Submissive Speech 11: Topics to Avoid with Other Submissives Read More »
Think about the last time you went out to eat or stood in line at a check out counter. Do you remember looking at the service person who waited on you? Did you smile at them and greet them or did you stay on your cell phone and not even acknowledge them as they served
Lessons in Submissive Speech 10: Speaking with Service Persons Read More »
Sometimes we forget that speaking in a submissive manner could include moments we don’t know who is on the other end of the conversation. Answering the phone or the door is a process that has gotten far too sloppy lately. I hope that with this advice we can begin to correct that. At least at
Lessons in Submissive Speech 9: Answering the Phone or Door Read More »
One of the most valuable things that I think any submissive should know is how to express gratitude in more than one way. I know I’ve taken a lot for granted when I was first starting out and exploring kink with anyone who was interested. Never once did I say thank you for it. I
Lessons in Submissive Speech 8: Showing Gratitude Read More »
In everyone’s daily exchanges with people there comes a time we will need to interrupt another person or persons to pass on information. For a polite and graceful submissive you should endeavor to not interrupt someone needlessly but to find an appropriate time to step into their presence. Often times I am sent as a messenger for
Lessons in Submissive Speech 7: Polite Interruptions Read More »
Just as saying yes or answering in the affirmative can be done many ways, saying no has many ways you can say it also. When a submissive gives a negative answer it can be a simple “no” or it can be as elaborate as the Dominant wishes. Some Dominants do not allow the submissive to
Lessons in Submissive Speech 6: Answering in the Negative Read More »
Saying yes is one of the most frequent phrases I say on a regular basis. There are several ways you can express a “yes” response to your Dominant or others. When a submissive says “yes” it can be as simple or elaborate as the Dominant wishes. This depends on the formality of the relationship and
Lessons in Submissive Speech 5: Answering in the Positive Read More »
The proper apology is an art, it really is. But before we put that together I’d like to cover the reason for apologizing in the first place. Submissive Guide has just released a new expanded edition of Lessons in Submissive Speech. Get Yours Now! Apologizing is not admitting your intentional disobedience. It’s not about accepting the
Lessons in Submissive Speech 4: How to Apologize Read More »
“What do I do if my significant other is vanilla?” This is part 2 and deals with a situation in which your vanilla partner is not receptive to what has been discussed in part 1. As mentioned in part 1, if after the first conversation in which you have expressed a mild version of your BDSM desires
You should never be afraid to ask a question of your Dominant, however, in certain circumstances, there are inappropriate ways to ask questions and inappropriate questions. First, and I have a hard time at this one too, you shouldn’t question a Dominant’s orders. It is not a submissive’s position to know why a Dominant wishes
Lessons in Submissive Speech 3: Asking a Question Read More »
Generally speaking, the first time you encounter someone in a BDSM context you will likely have to introduce yourself. We’ve all heard that you only get one chance to make a first impression to make sure it’s a good one. I’m going to break this up into two separate sections. One for single submissives and
Lessons in Submissive Speech 2: Personal Introductions Read More »
In a BDSM context, it’s more common to have to learn how to address someone than in a non-scene situation. How many times have you had conversations with service personnel or with people you encounter in your day to day without first asking them their name or how they wish to be addressed? It’s a
Lessons in Submissive Speech 1: Addressing Individuals Read More »
There is a problem that is more common within online submission that I refer to as shelf-sitting. I have experienced it and am slowly seeing it happen to others that I know of online communities. It is sad that this is occurring but perhaps I could shed some light on what it is and perhaps
Don’t Be a Shelf-Sitter Read More »
Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other
Introduction to Lessons in Submissive Speech Series Read More »
Erotic spanking. It is probably the most common kinky play activity and is done in a lot of relationships that may know nothing about kink at all to those who are extremely kinky. It’s just a hot thing to do during sex. I was being spanked long before I entered the scene. I hope that
Perspectives: Erotic Spanking Read More »
Let’s face it. Not everyone out there is graced with excellent health, some of us are even chronically ill. Myself, I face being on dialysis along with Lupus and Fibro. I am in a ton of pain a good deal of the time and have 3 wonderful children, 2 with special needs that require that
When Mommy/slave is Ill… Read More »
