Today is day 2 of the Submissive Advent Calendar. If you missed yesterday’s post you can go back to that now, or rewind all the way to the beginning. You can also read the introduction post. There are moments in our life where we can lose sight of why we are submitting, or we can’t grasp that warm […]
Submissive Advent – Day 2: Create a Submissive Token Read More »
Welcome to the first day of Submissive Advent. Every day we’ll learn more about ourselves, our relationship or perspective relationships and our submission. Shakespeare has a couple of sonnets that are often used as poems of submission and service. Today, I’d like to share Sonnet 57: Being your slave what should I do but tend
Submissive Advent – Day 1: In Wait Read More »
The Advent is the time in anticipation for Christmas and is celebrated in some religious circles, but also carries a secular following. Advent translated means “the coming.” I’m sure everyone has seen the cardboard calendars with little doors and chocolate inside; to be opened one a day until Christmas Day. Well, I’ve had this idea of
Submissive Advent Calendar Read More »
A presenter I saw recently said that as a master, the first thing he does is to ask for his new s-type to fill out one of those online “sexual interest” lists where you rank your kink interests on a scale from zero for “Yes, please,” to five for “Oh, HELL no.” Then he takes
Never Say Never: Overcoming Hard Limits Read More »
Did you know that how you see the world isn’t what makes your life positive or negative, it’s how you interpret your life’s events that can turn the glass half full to half empty? Your skill in interpreting events and experiences for better or worse lies in your hands. Oftentimes as submissives we tell ourselves
Solo Coaching – Glass Half Empty or Half Full: Working on a Positive Point of View Read More »
Is it possible to have a need for submission? I’m in an amazing “vanilla” relationship, with a past of D/S for both of us. We both know of the other’s past, and recently began to incorporate some D/S components to our relationship. The issue is I feel like I have a need to submit. It’s not just
Is Submission a Need? Read More »
Trust is a big factor in all relationships. I would even go as far to say that trust is an even bigger factor in D/s and M/s relationships than most others, but I could be wrong. How do you know when you really trust someone? I know a lot of people out there say they
Just How Much Trust Do YOU Have? Read More »
Hi Luna, I was reading your post about the gift of submission. I thought it was very eye opening. I took your eCourse and it really helped but I am still very confused and feeling overwhelmed. Here’s are my questions. I have been communicating with a Dom for about two months and he insists that I
Am I Submitting or Not? Read More »
What’s the difference between a protocol and a ritual? Even experienced people in the lifestyle can get tripped up on this one, but there are a few basic differences that will allow you to rapidly tell the two apart. A ritual: Some examples of common rituals are greeting rituals where the submissive meets the dominant
Telling the Difference Between a Ritual and a Protocol Read More »
Of all the subjects to write about on submission, this seems the most vanilla to me, probably because it didn’t use to be unusual for one partner in a partnership to maintain the bank accounts all that long ago. For some vanilla couples, it still isn’t. Personally, I am not a very organized person and
Letting Go of the Bank Account – Submitting to Financial Control Read More »
We are all online anymore. We don’t hand out phone numbers but readily give our email addresses and instant messenger ids. The world has shifted from a direct contact world to one behind screens. We are no longer watchful of our behavior and manners online. I’ve also been caught up in the anonymity that talking
Online Courtesy Needs a Reboot – Don’t Be THAT Submissive Read More »
Consent and Negotiation are probably something that we think about but don’t really acknowledge daily. It is important none the less to think about and address in a Dominant/submissive relationship. Why? There are many reasons but the most important one is being safe not only with your partner but more importantly with yourself. Consent is
The Importance of Consent in D/s Negotiation Read More »
Whether you are preparing for a scene or well into aftercare it’s always handy to have tools and resources at hand that can help you through all the stages of the play time many of us adore. I’ve gathered a list of the articles and essays on this site that are related to scene care
In Readiness – Scene Care and Aftercare Read More »
I’m going to take a bit of liberty in my assumption here but bear with me for a moment. When you first learn about submission and what it might entail it is likely you are learning about bedroom submission and the pleasures of serving the sexual and sensual needs of your partner. Oftentimes these submissives
Is Your Heart Truly In It? – Fulfilling Submission Needs Desire Read More »
This is a guest post by Shahjahani. She is a personal friend of mine and a fantastic educator. I originally heard of these precepts when speaking of death and dying. I elaborated on them then to help myself understand my place in the death and dying process. I shared my thoughts back then with those that
BDSM and Submission: The Five Precepts of Service Read More »
I’ve never been a submissive but my new boyfriend is a professionally trained Dominant that has been in the lifestyle for many years. I knew this about him before we started dating and told him I could accept it in our relationship. He’s ready to incorporate this but I find it utterly ridiculous to get
Kneeling Feels Absurd, How Do I Get Over It? Read More »
You’ve finished the book! I definitely want to know what you thought about it in the comments. The last chapters were excellent as far as working through surrender, negotiation, discussing abuse, 24/7 living and staying on track. I think these chapters had more bulk to them than previous ones as far as necessary content. Here
Conquer Me Book Club – Week 3 Read More »
Want to know a secret? Submission gets better every day. What makes it so good? I’m not going to tell you any revelations that you probably don’t already know. But here goes. Your personal investment in your future is what makes it better every day. The fact that you follow Submissive Guide to learn and
The Secret to Better Submission Every Day Read More »
Welcome to week 2 of the book club event! This week’s reading was intense and meaty, trust me I know! I had to read it twice in order to get everything out of it that I wanted to. What are you thinking about the book so far? The reading this time had to do a
Conquer Me Book Club – Week 2 Read More »
It may not be clear to others by now but I’m pretty good at asking myself questions and asking questions for reflection with others. It’s how much of the topics I write come to be. I ask myself a question and then try to answer it. It’s an art that I’ve had to learn because
Solo Coaching – Ask Yourself the Right Questions Read More »
