Growing up my parents were extremely physically and emotionally abusive. I moved out when I was thirteen, but I carried the previous abuse with me wherever I went. It made me cry when I detected the slightest amount of anger towards me, it made me shake and pull away when people waved their hands at […]
How S&M Saved My Life Read More »
When you first learned about submission or BDSM you may have felt a sense of coming home, of finally understanding what wasn’t sitting right for you. But along with that relief come questions. You thought you knew who you were, and now you’ve been thrown into a new world and you don’t know who you
Finding Your Way to a Genuine Self Read More »
This is a guest post by DeliciousVixen. When people are on the outside looking in at the world of BDSM, it is a popular belief of them to say that we must have been wronged some time in our lives to become this way. Whether submissive or Dominant, they would think that our way of living
Be Not Ashamed – Accepting Who You Are and Where You Came From Read More »
Every day you go to work and are in charge of people, or you have a management position. Perhaps you just feel that being in control outside of the home is comfortable for you. But you come home to submit. Or maybe you are an extroverted person and love interacting socially but with the right
Dominant Personality with a Submissive Identity Read More »
You’re surfing the internet one day and come across a forum of people talking about their sex lives. It’s interesting to you so you stop and read a bit. Just when you thought you were like everyone else, someone mentions something that you enjoy doing during sex and the responses are, “Oh that’s kinky!” It
BDSM Basics: Am I Kinky If…? Read More »
When Sir and I moved in together and we opened our bank accounts, it was a huge relief that bill paying was no longer on my to-do list. They always created such anxiety, even when I knew the money was there to cover the bills and then some. It felt as if it were a
How I Help Our Finances Without Knowing the Numbers Read More »
Hi. My slave and I are going to a dungeon together for the first time. I’m wondering about how she should talk. She has rules for talking with me. But not for talking with others in the community. I know she should be respectful to all. But how should she address other Masters and slaves?
How Should a Submissive Act at a Dungeon Party? Read More »
Welcome new contributor andyiccee! My Master and I have been together for nearly three years, we have been through family crises, late studying nights, and more fights than I can count, but we always come out stronger on the other side. Integrating S&M into our sex life was a very simple transition, we communicated fantasies,
A Mental Predicament: Balancing Wants and Needs Read More »
Hi! My boyfriend and I both want a BDSM relationship, but we both still have roommates. He’s hesitant to continue the discussion on rules he would like for me to follow due to the fact that punishment for these rules would be hard due to lack of privacy. Any suggestions about discreet punishments? Having a
Ideas for Discreet Punishment Read More »
Over at my personal blog, InsatiableDesire.com, I write a series called ” No Stupid (Kink) Questions (NSKQ)”. I started it a few years ago because every time I stuck my head in a kink forum, I found serious questions asked by newbies and never really answered by more advanced kinksters. I mean, if you are proficient in
No Stupid (Sex Toy) Questions: Should my vagina be burning?! Read More »
My boyfriend and I have only recently taken the baby steps from a vanilla relationship to a D/s one. I feel like I’ve followed all the suggested steps about how to transition a relationship, I follow submissive guide religiously, I’ve read lots of books and done plenty of research. We’ve talked and set down guidelines.
Why Isn’t Our Relationship Going Anywhere? Read More »
A Dominant’s collar symbolizes deep commitment in a D/s relationship. Explore what a collar means, how to prepare for it, and if you’re ready to accept this powerful symbol.
Expectations of a Collar: How Ready Are You to Accept One? Read More »
Hi Luna. I’m a sub and I have an online Dom. We have a lot of fun together but he wants far more time and play from me than I can afford to give. I told him this but he still wants more. I don’t want to hurt him and I don’t want to leave
Dominant Is Asking for More Time than I Can Give Read More »
With the trailer of the “50 Shades of Grey” movie being released, my Facebook newsfeed and what I have seen on Fetlife in multiple groups, that’s all anyone seems to be able to talk about. I have managed to not see the trailer because I have no interest, but some of the discussions that have come up,
BDSM and the Media: The Influence of Media on the Perception of BDSM Read More »
If there’s one topic that comes up time and again on this blog, in readers’ emails to me and online forums is how do you care for bruises and other physical and emotional reminders of play? Since 2009 when I started writing this site I’ve returned to this topic time and again with interesting and
How to Care for Bruises and More BDSM Play Recovery Tips Read More »
This is a guest post by Autumn. I’m Relatively new to the BDSM community, but Master Grey is not. He introduced it to me slowly, respectfully, but my desire grew to know more, leading me to your website. :) A day in the life begins, really when I wake up. This varies currently due to my
A Day in the Life of a Submissive – Autumn Read More »
Ms Luna, your guide has become my bible and I thank you for your writings. My first Dom/mentor/teacher and I have parted suddenly and unexpectedly. Since this is my first D/S relationship, what can I do to feel better about the raw unraveling and abandonment of feeling so alone? First, you are not alone. People
Advice On How To Recover From a Breakup Read More »
Hey lunaKM! I am quite new to this lifestyle, and the submissive guide has been so, so helpful. But I was wondering what’s the safest way to get in touch with potential online Doms? There are so many sites, I’m a little overwhelmed. Thanks, Megan :) Hi Megan! Any sort of communication online can be
How Can I Safely Contact Online Doms? Read More »
I see it all the time on discussion boards and we talk about it at social gatherings. I’ve even thought it a time or two. D/s relationships are better than vanilla ones. We see them as deeper, more intimate, better at communication and meeting the individual’s needs as well as the couple’s. For those of
Are D/s Relationships Better than Vanilla Ones? Read More »
Hello there! There is no “proper manner” for asking for a collar. It’s not a common expectation in the BDSM community. Some Dominants require that the submissive ask to be collared, others insist that it’s their responsibility to ask if the submissive wants to be collared by them. If you are familiar with John Norman’s
How do I ask to be collared? Read More »
