by Ambrosio. This was first published on Ambrosio’s site and has a free to distribute license. Abrosio dedicated this article to Beverly M. in Austin. Flagging not Flogging Flagging refers to non-verbal signals that serve as very specific cues in the scene. Most of them originated from the Gay leather scene of the 40’s and […]
Dear lunaKM, I am new to the lifestyle, and have never had a true Dom. However, now there is a Dom that has shown interest in me, alongside his current submissive/fiancee. While it would be a long distance relationship (LDR), I am interested in the offer, but unsure as how to pursue. To give a
How to Approach a Couple into Kink and Polyamory when You are New Read More »
I was recently chatting at a local BDSM coffee event with a just-made friend who made mention (as she was just meeting my husband and I for the first time) that it was quite surprising to learn that he is the Dominant one and I am the submissive one. We get this all the time, if we
Don’t Judge A Label By Its Cover: Dispelling Stereotypes of D/s Roles Read More »
by Ambrosio. This was first published on Ambrosio’s site and has a free to distribute license. Abrosio dedicated this article to Beverly M. in Austin. Three Types of Parties Play parties — or dungeon parties — are parties where people in the Leather and BDSM scene can go to play, socialize, and watch. There are
Dear SG, My Dominant has a habit of teasing me without any following ‘relief’. He will get my motor running and then leave me all riled up. He gets busy with something else. Sometimes this teasing can go on for weeks, even months because of his busy lifestyle. How can I cope with the frustration?!
One of the things that I think many practiced people of the BDSM community pride themselves on is their ability to positively follow up sex. We like to throw around the word “after care” like it’s vernacular rather than jargon—the way that we also generally assume having a first aid kit with a pair of
6 Important Activities to Include in Your Aftercare Routine Read More »
New to BDSM and kinky roleplay? Get inspired with beginner-friendly scene ideas for exploring bondage, roleplay, and BDSM play in the bedroom. Perfect for first-timers!
It’s no secret that 50 Shades of Gray is a huge media success. It’s brought about fame for the author and attracted many people to the theaters to see the film adaptation. But it has also brought curious people to this site and many like it for answers and exploration. Many people first get introduced
In my continuous effort to read the books that have been in the bottom of my Kindle, I came across Kitty Thomas’ Tender Mercies. It wasn’t until I finished it and was writing a review that I realized what a great lesson this piece of fiction can teach those in the lifestyle, especially those that are new.
A Lesson on The Importance of Online Safety from Kitty Thomas’ “Tender Mercies” Read More »
by Ambrosio. This was first published on Ambrosio’s site and has a free to distribute license. Abrosio dedicated this article to Beverly M. in Austin. Expectations of Sex BDSM is not always about sex. BDSM is not synonymous with swinging, swapping, or Polyamory — although it’s possible for it to co-exist with these lifestyles. A
A healthy, happy relationship is one of the key desires for many submissives, no matter where they are on their journey. When I first started exploring BDSM, I encountered many people who instilled valuable knowledge that strong, stable, and loving relationships can exist between Dominants and submissives. It made me crave a relationship so badly
Due to the traditional components of the Dominant/submissive dynamic, the topic of financial dependency seems to spring up in a lot of discussions. Is being financially dependent integral to being a 27/4 submissive? Does long term submission mean giving up your job? Is it healthy, or does it raise red flags? So forth, etc. Like
Thinking About Financial Dependency in Your D/s Dynamic? Read More »
by Ambrosio. This was first published on Ambrosio’s site and has a free to distribute license. Ambrosio dedicated this article to Beverly M. in Austin. Did you miss part 1? Read it Now. Socializing & Networking Socializing takes place at muches, general meetings, runs, and parties. Munches are semi-public gatherings of BDSM enthusiasts for the purpose
This is a guest post by Rachel M. For novice level masochists at play, who are curious about BDSM, make sure to get all your facts straight. So, before you go full-throttle, humiliating and whipping your partner, collect everything there’s to know first—and don’t rely on what you see in the media. Are you ready
Exposed! 5 Myths of BDSM You Should Know Read More »
Dear Submissive Guide, I am finally at ease with my Daddy Dom, ready to move on in our relationship, giving him my trust which has been hard for me, because of past abuses. Even thinking of myself as ‘little” for him was hard at first. But I so enjoy the simple nature of the relationship.
How Do I Let Him Know I’m Committed to Him? Read More »
I’m devoting this Monday to meditation, reflection, and devotion to submission. I hope to select topics that will get you thinking differently about some part of your life or submission and then just maybe grow a little bit further. If you have ideas for topics that might work for a Meditation Monday, please email me. How’s your self-esteem? Do you feel
Self-Esteem and Unsolicited Advice – Submissive Meditation Monday Read More »
Luna, what is reasonable to expect from a dominant in exchange for submission and service? I realize everyone is different, but when a sub is not being financially supported and is doing household care and management, handling the everyday paperwork of bill paying, handling home repair calls, etc.; assuming her Dom is loving, caring, what else
What Should I Expect from My Dominant? Read More »
by Ambrosio. This was first published on Ambrosio’s site and has a free to distribute license. Abrosio dedicated this article to Beverly M. in Austin. Good Manners vs. Correct Protocol “Manners are of more importance than laws. Manners are what vex or soothe, corrupt or purify, exalt or debase, barbarize or refine us, by a
Dear Submissive Guide, I’m new to the scene and realizing I’m very interested in submission and masochism. I’m also gay and transgender (an FtM who is attracted to men). I’m gearing up the courage to go to a play party, and while I might not play at my first one I will want to play
How To Navigate Public BDSM Play as a Transgender Person Read More »
“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.” Submissive Guide was started not just to share what I know; it is also, at least for me, a way to continue to learn by talking out my struggles and answering the questions presented to me. Communication is a key
Every Good Conversation Starts with Active Listening Read More »
