Are You Ready for More Solo-Coaching? Check Out Where Your Journey Will Progress Next!

By / 4 minutes of reading

The last time we were doing some solo-coaching here on Submissive Guide we had just gotten started trying to learn what coaching is and how to hold meetings with yourself, journal your thoughts and understand your current goals. I even bundled it up into an ebook if you want the whole first series. Solo Coaching […]

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Breaking the Apology Habit: Alternatives to Overusing ‘I’m Sorry’

By / 10 minutes of reading

I was raised to say “please,” “thank you,” and apologize if I did something wrong. This politeness is ingrained in us as children. Being polite serves as a way to express empathy and respect for others. However, the phrase “I’m sorry,” has become a reflex rather than a meaningful expression. Many of us use it

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What You Don’t Know About Using Safewords Could Harm You – Get The Facts

By / 7 minutes of reading

Safety comes in many forms and at any level of risk awareness. One of the very first things you learn when you encounter BDSM is the use of safewords. Even this site has numerous articles covering the basics of safewords. But now, I feel it’s time to gather everything together and really dig deep into

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I’m a New Dominant, How Can Submissive Guide Help Me Understand My Submissive?

By / 9 minutes of reading

When I began Submissive Guide years ago, I wanted it to be a safe haven for information and experience exchange for submissives. I didn’t realize that it would be a resource for Dominants as well. As time went on, I noticed that I was getting questions from Dominants in my email and praise from them

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How To Find Someone to Play With at a Party and Other Negotiation Basics

By / 10 minutes of reading

One of the more daunting prospects as a single kinky person or someone who is open to casual play is approaching others at a play party with whom you might be interested playing. It’s often called pick up play because you are simply trying to pick someone up for the purpose of play. Whether you

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Feeling Like a Failure – The Crash and Burn of a Slave: A Personal Story

By / 7 minutes of reading

I was failing as a submissive. Something in me had broken and that magical, powerful feeling that submission was once giving me was gone. I didn’t want to believe that I wasn’t submissive anymore but every single clue was that something was wrong with my emotional wellbeing, and my happiness was clouded by the depression

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Feeling Submissive Again After a Break – How I Am Reclaiming Myself

By / 7 minutes of reading

Sometimes, even though you try your hardest, that spark of submission fades. Whether that be from stress, relationship issues, a death in the family or some other upheaval there may come a time when you feel yourself fighting submission, arguing with every request and pushing against your Dominant at every turn. You may even just

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The Sexual Submissive

By / 6 minutes of reading

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. A sexual submissive is a person who manifests submissive traits only in direct connection with sexual arousal and release. In all other aspects of their life this person will probably comport themselves in

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Uprooting Self-Sabotaging Behaviors: Learning How to Make Changes that Stick

By / 9 minutes of reading

There are many relationships both inside and outside of the Lifestyle that exist under undue strain and eventually crumble under the weight of the behaviors that are a result of self-sabotage, and all too often these habitual patterns aren’t recognized though they are repeated with great frequency. A cycle of strife is perpetuated year in

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The Collar of Consideration

By / 4 minutes of reading

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Collaring is the term commonly used by those in the D/s community to describe the commencement of a relationship between a Dominant and a submissive. It carries the same type of weight that

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Understanding Humility in D/s

By / 4 minutes of reading

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. HUMBLE: …not proud or haughty, not arrogant or assertive, reflecting, expressing or offered in a spirit of deference, respect or submission, unpretentious, lacking all signs of pride, aggressiveness or assertiveness. How simple the

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When Fantasy Collides with Reality: Weighing Expectations when Exploring Kink Fantasies

By / 6 minutes of reading

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Long ago the first imagery appeared. In most cases we cannot pinpoint the moment or recognize it’s import in our life. When I was a child I went to the library every Tuesday

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What is (Emotional) Abuse in a BDSM Relationship?

By / 5 minutes of reading

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Emotion ~ A physiological departure from maintenance of a relatively stable internal environment. This environment is sustained through a series of interacting physiological processes such as drives, motivations and other psychodynamic forces. Emotion

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