Every day I’m exposed to or learn about another kink or fetish that I was not aware of. It’s a wonderful and fascinating experience that continues to expand my education and curiosity. Just as when we were very young and asked our parents, “what’s that?” constantly, I’m like a child growing and developing opinions on what I learn. Some kinks are tickling my interest, yet others I can’t wrap my head around.
I’m not going to name kinks that I don’t understand; that’s not the point of this essay. The focus of this article is to teach that just because your kinks are things I’m not remotely interested in doesn’t mean we can’t stand on common ground. It’s okay to be different and yet be friends. People do it all the time.
But on a reoccurring basis, I am seeing people making judgments on others based on whether they like their kinks or not. I can’t say if it’s because they are too naive to comprehend the kink or the people who engage in it or if they are so close minded that if people don’t fit into a precise mold then they are rejected. It’s not for me to make that call.
What I can say is that as a social underground network we need to be more accepting of those of us who have unique kinks and perspectives. We need to open our minds to the possibility that people can get turned on by things that we don’t. Just as we struggle to find acceptance for being kinky, we need to invite those that are into different kinks into our understanding.
There is no reason why the balloon fetishists, adult babies, scat players and blood sports fans can’t get along long enough to come to the conclusion that they are all kinky. It’s okay to not understand each others’ kink, but it’s not okay to consider them, shall I say, more perverted than you and not worth recognition.
It’s a shame that when you attend a munch that you may feel ostracized because of your specific kinks. I am personally familiar with a couple that doesn’t feel welcome in their local munch because they engage in a fetish that isn’t widely known (to the local area). They aren’t considered kinky enough! How odd is that? Why must I put everyone’s kinks on a scale to see if they fit in?
The bedroom players are just as worthy to be a part of the kink community as the lifestyle D/s relationships are. The light bondage fans can join the parties where extreme impact play takes place. There’s room for everyone. It’s about time we treated everyone with respect as people and not quantify them according to how kinky they are or if their form of kink is better than another.
We are all one kink.
(My apologies about the preachiness of this post. I’ve addressed recently a form of prejudice within the kink community based completely on incomplete facts about kinks. It got to me. )