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pinksubgeek

pinksubgeek is a bona fide nerd who loves learning new things. You can follow her on Twitter at @pinksubgeek or email her at pinksubgeek@yahoo.com.

Empowerment, Not Exploitation: Women Activists are Wrong About the Kink Community

I am a submissive.  I have never felt exploited in any way.  In fact, I feel empowered.  I feel empowered in a way I have never felt before. It angers me to read that in light of the theatrical release of Fifty Shades of Grey, women activists believe that the kink community exploits women. That couldn’t […]

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Fifty Shades of Grey, Consent and the Media’s Representation of Kink

We all knew that the Fifty Shades of Grey movie would bring about a conversation regarding BDSM, non-vanilla relationships, and the nature of consent between adult sexual partners.  I read an article discussing the “impact” of the film, and it got me thinking. In the interests of full disclosure, I will tell you that I have read

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Creating Realistic Submissive Goals Sets You Up for Success

Last year I wrote about the importance of revising your contracts at the start of the New Year so you can make sure that it reflects your current relationship parameters and hard/soft limits.  I’m still a single submissive, and (for the time being) I’m enjoying this journey of self-discovery and self-improvement.  One thing that single submissives must always remember is

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An Accidental Outing: Encountering Other Kinky People in Your Vanilla Life

Since discovering my submissive side back in 2012, I’ve been in a perpetual holding pattern when it comes to meeting people in my local kinky community.  I want to get involved, but I’m also afraid of taking that first step.  I’ve done tons of research using the incredibly helpful articles on Submissive Guide, which has helped to

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The Importance of Keeping It All Together After Being Released From a Collar

This entry is part 9 of 10 in the series Relationship Breakup

In the immortal words of Whitesnake:  “And I know what it means/To walk along the lonely street of dreams/And here I go again on my own.” I’ve been released from my Dominant.   This was my first D/s relationship, so I don’t have any experience to compare this to.  It’s not like a Vanilla break-up.  No, not

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Release from the Collar: A Journey

This entry is part 10 of 10 in the series Relationship Breakup

March 20, 2014. Sir released me tonight.  I’ve been released. I admire and respect his reasoning.  He has a lot going on and he can’t fulfill his responsibilities as my Dom.  He recognizes this and made the decision with my best interests in mind.  I didn’t ask for this; I wasn’t unhappy with our relationship. 

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A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Goal Setting in a D/s or M/s Dynamic

Every December as the holidays wane, we start thinking about New Year’s resolutions and ways to make our lives better.  The New Year is a fresh start and optimism is contagious.  For submissives, though, resolutions mean so much more.  Frankly, I’ve decided that the world would be a better place if everyone had a Dom/me

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A Submissive’s New Year’s Resolutions: Reviewing and Updating your Checklist

When I first discovered my submissive side, Sir gave me a BDSM checklist to fill out. It was a spreadsheet over six pages long with categories such as sex, bondage, S&M, role-playing, and toys. The columns include basic yes/no/maybe options, as well as soft/hard limit and “only with Sir.” The list was so comprehensive and

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