This is a question tammy asked for March Question Month: I have had a few Doms and I am in a relationship where I live with one.I didn’t think I could find someone that makes me this happy but I did. The problem is I keep thinking about my first Dom that introduced me into […]
Are You Cheating on Your Dominant With Your Ex Dominant’s Memory? Read More »
For March Question Month Cilla Noir asks: How do you handle your serious mood swings or when something just “sets you off”? When you go from one end of the spectrum to another – sometimes justified, sometimes not. Normally, when I was on my own, I would just throw a fit. Being back in a
Diffuse Extreme Mood Swings Before They Get You In Trouble Read More »
Topping from the bottom has been given a bad wrap. It’s considered by many to be a faux pax for any submissive. Online communities shun and shame many people who even ask about the subject and want to know if what they did was considered wrong. Too many people tell these people that yes it
When Is It Okay to Top From the Bottom? Read More »
Every submissive goes though it. You may be going through it now. Those butterflies in your stomach because you’ve just set a date for your first play session. Things are still so new and exciting. You don’t know what to expect or how you will react to things. It’s all so strange and foreign feeling.
First Playtime Jitters and How to Arrive Prepared Read More »
We all have one. FetLife is all the rage, but also we have alt.com, bondage.com, and others where we place ads and identity profiles to get people interested. This interest can be friends or relationship related; it doesn’t matter. What matters is what we broadcast to everyone across our profiles. You need to keep things secure and consider what’s
What NOT to Share on Your Online Profile Read More »
When I first started exploring submission I heard and read numerous times that submission is a gift to the Dominant that accepts it. For a long time, I subscribed to this way of thinking and there is nothing wrong with thinking about your submission this way. I’m not here to tell you that you are
The Gift of Submission, Or Is It? Read More »
Reading across the blogosphere you will encounter these words almost synonymous to each other: Discipline and Punishment. The words are far from the same however some dynamics treat them the same. In fact, for the longest time, I have used the word punishment when I mean discipline. It’s even possible that Master has used these
Are Discipline and Punishment The Same? Read More »
I’ve been developing a submissive code of ethics for myself to help give me long term goals and a focus. I feel it will bring about change in me that perhaps I can’t see yet. I thought I would share it here so that you can perhaps get some ideas for developing your own code
My Submissive Code of Ethics Read More »
Being that I’m a masochist, I love pain. I’ve never really thought about it or analyzed what that means really, but reading other people’s blogs has always helped me see that saying I’m masochist is just another huge personal term in BDSM as a whole. So, to think it though, this is what being a
Processing Pain and Being a Masochist Read More »
Last month we were in the kitchen, this month I want to walk you through cleaning and maintaining a tidy bathroom. I feel that cleanliness in the bathroom shows guests how important cleanliness is in your home and your own person. While I currently don’t have much more than a hallway sized bathroom with a shower
Domesticity: The Bathroom Read More »
I was listening to Mistress Matisse’s Guest Appearance the other day on the Savage Lovecast (Ep 163). She talks about a lot of kinky topics that callers ask Dan Savage. Somewhere near the end, there was an interesting comment by Dan where he asked MM if nerds and geeks are more likely to be into
Is BDSM the Nerds and Geeks Club? Read More »
“I have a fetish for wool socks, I just love them!” “I have a fetish for corsets, I can’t get off without thinking of them!” One of these statements is a sure sign of a fetish; the other is a misuse of the term. Sure this is a poor example. How many times have you
The Ins and Outs of Fetishes Read More »
When Master and I get to play, it’s quite sexually charged. We find the play and the energy we swap as very sexual. Our play time usually ends in sex of some form. That’s just how we roll. Does it always have to be that way? Heck no! In fact, when I was casually playing,
Can You Separate BDSM and Sex? Read More »
I had a question sent to me via YouTube asking me about for information about dress protocols. I can only tell you what I am familiar with, so be aware that there are many many other forms of dress protocols and just as many (if not more) reasons behind them. I’m going to assume that the person
What are Dress Protocols? Read More »
The kitchen is the heart of any home and having a clean and germ-free work environment for cooking and food preparation is important. Knowing some skills and cleaning tips can make keeping your kitchen clean and sparkling effortless. No longer is doing dishes and mopping floors drudgery; enhanced it can be an important part of
Domesticity: The Kitchen Read More »
In previous articles of this series, we’ve talked about honing into your values and making sure your personal needs are met, now is a good time to talk about the past. That’s right, I’m sure you are aware by now if you’ve been following this series that a lot of things can impact your goal
Letting Go: How to Let Go of the Past and Be a Happy Submissive Read More »
Expressing gratitude for your Dominant partner and what they do to enrich your life may seem simple. You can always say thank you. That’s good manners. I really hope you take every opportunity to say thank you, but what if you want a few more creative ways to show how appreciative you are to your
5 Ways to Express Your Gratitude to Your Dominant Read More »
When aftercare is mentioned, it is rarely associated with the Dominant. We hear all about how to help the submissive come down from the endorphin high, treat the marks and aches and emotionally recover from the scene. Do we think that Dominants feel nothing during play that they don’t need care afterward? Think again. When
How To Help Your Dominant Recover From Play Read More »
When you get married, you have to legally sign a document attesting to your decision to be married. The legal document can come in many forms but most have a brief section about what each party declares for the union, how they will treat each other and how commitment will be displayed (change of names
What You Need To Know About Using Contracts to Negotiate a Relationship Read More »
So, you want me to tell you how you can tell if you are submissive or not? Asking someone else if you are submissive is like asking a blind man what color your dress is. Is there some magical online quiz that can say whether you are submissive or slave? Unfortunately no and I don’t
