Absolutely. You don’t have to be perfect, or even close to it, to be a good submissive. In fact, if we all waited until we were fully healed, fully confident, and fully “ready,” most of us would never begin our submissive journeys at all. Submission doesn’t require perfection. It requires a willingness to submit. So […]
Maintaining a D/s dynamic in public doesn’t require putting your kink on display. With subtle protocol, private signals, and thoughtful consent, you can stay connected to your Dominant while blending seamlessly into everyday life. This guide shows you how to create discreet, meaningful public D/s that fits your relationship.
Submitting in Public: How to Maintain Your D/s Dynamic Without Exposing It Read More »
Rituals can be powerful tools for keeping your submission alive in daily life. Learn how to design simple, meaningful routines that strengthen your D/s mindset, foster connection, and bring purpose to ordinary moments. Whether kneeling, journaling, or serving coffee, your rituals become daily acts of devotion and growth.
Creating Personal Rituals to Deepen Your Submission Read More »
It’s not uncommon for submissives to meet Dominants who are just as new, or even more nervous, than they are. After all, power exchange isn’t a one-way street. Just as submissives wrestle with questions like “Am I doing this right?” or “What if I’m not a ‘real’ sub?”, new Dominants can feel the same pressure.
How can a willing sub help a willing but nervous new Dom feel comfortable in the scene? Read More »
Walking into a munch or community event for the first time can feel like stepping into a lion’s den—especially if you’re introverted or struggle with social anxiety. The truth is, many submissives (and Dominants, too) in the scene are introverts at heart. We’re drawn to meaningful, one-on-one connection, not noisy rooms or forced small talk.
I’m an introvert with social anxiety. Any tips for going to munches or scene events? Read More »
Not sure what to wear to your first play party or dungeon event? From lingerie and fetish fashion to roleplay looks and budget-friendly ideas, this guide helps you feel confident, comfortable, and scene-ready. Discover how to dress for your dynamic and express your authentic self while respecting community etiquette.
What to Wear to a BDSM Play Party Read More »
Question: I have recently begun a D/s long-distance dynamic relationship. It’s exhilarating and freeing at times, but then he cuts communication with me. It’s so painful and frustrating. Sometimes I know why (pleasuring myself without permission), and most times idk why he’s cut me off. Prior to agreeing to accept him as my master, we
My long distance partner cuts communication with me and it hurts, what can I do? Read More »
When the world feels overwhelming, submission can offer comfort and grounding. This heartfelt reflection explores how to protect your peace, reconnect with your rituals, and rediscover the quiet strength of surrender during turbulent times.
Finding Sanctuary in Submission When the World Feels Heavy Read More »
What are you expected to do and know as a submissive? For many who are just starting out, the answer really is: not much. And yet, that’s never a satisfying answer, is it? We all want clarity, especially when stepping into something as vulnerable and meaningful as submission. Of course, there’s more to it. But
Expectations of a Submissive: What You Need to Know (and What You Don’t) Read More »
Choosing a collar is one of the most meaningful decisions a D/s couple can make. Much like an engagement or wedding ring, a collar represents commitment, devotion, and the unique bond between Dominant and submissive. That’s why the “perfect” collar isn’t about what looks best in a shop window—it’s about what carries meaning for both
How do we find the perfect collar? Read More »
Submissive mantras are powerful tools for grounding, focus, and resilience in D/s dynamics. Learn what mantras are, how they differ from affirmations, and why they’re especially valuable for submissives. Discover practical steps to create your own mantra and keep your submission intentional, centered, and joyful.
5 Simple Steps to Creating a Personal Submissive Mantra Read More »
Question: I am a house husband. My dom wife wants to be left alone after a long day at work to unwind, but I am so anxious to see her that she complains I am too needy. How can I, as a house husband, treat her better to show my submissive desires? Answer: One of
Defensive habits like fight, flight, freeze, and fawn often keep us from the vulnerability and openness submission requires. In this Solo-coaching session, we explore how these self-protective patterns show up in D/s dynamics, why they no longer serve us, and practical steps submissives can take to release them and build deeper trust.
Solo-coaching: Releasing Defensive Patterns as a Submissive Read More »
Question: How do you bring up wanting to escalate your relationship with your current play partner into a full dynamic? We have both expressed interest, but no concrete discussion has taken place. Answer: This is such a great question, because many of us find ourselves here at some point. Play partners can be wonderful, but
Question: Why is it called serving a Dominant? I don’t like that kind of phrasing and insinuation that I am somehow below the Dominant. Answer: It’s completely understandable that the word “serve” can rub you the wrong way. In everyday life, “service” often gets tangled up with ideas of being lesser, having lower status, or
Why is it called serving a Dominant? Read More »
Rules in a D/s relationship can be more than boundaries—they can be powerful tools for connection, growth, and maintaining the submissive mindset. In this article, I share how rules shape my submission, the emotional value they hold, and practical strategies any submissive can use to follow them with consistency and purpose.
How Rules In a D/s Relationship Can Have a Positive Effect on Your Submission Read More »
Discover how to write affirmations that truly work for submissives. Learn to replace negative self-talk with empowering beliefs, strengthen your submissive mindset, and integrate affirmations into daily life. This guide offers practical steps, examples, and insight to help you grow into the submissive you aspire to be.
Writing Submissive Affirmations That Actually Work Read More »
How long should you chat with a Dom online before meeting? A week is a fair start, but don’t stay stuck in endless texting. Learn when it’s time to suggest a coffee date, what their response can reveal, and how to spot if they’re serious—or just stringing you along.
How long should I talk with a Dom online before a face to face date? Read More »
Question: How would you express changes in your feelings over poly to your Master, when the second sub he is considering you do not like her, without losing your relationship with him? Answer: When we’re in a power exchange relationship, especially a poly one, expressing hard feelings can feel like walking a tightrope. What if
Getting into the submissive mindset can feel like chasing a moving target—blissful one moment, elusive the next. This article explores what the submissive mindset truly is, how to access it more consistently, and practical ways to sustain that feeling without burning out. Whether you crave a 24/7 headspace or just want to reconnect more often, this guide offers realistic advice, personal insight, and tools to help you find your way back to submission when you need it most.
How to Reach and Maintain the Submissive Mindset in BDSM Read More »
