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The Many Faces of Submission

What I'm about to lay out for you is not the only way these terms can be described but it is a good measure for the novice and open to your interpretation. No one way to serve is better than another in this list. Remember that not matter where we are on the mountainous journey, the goal is the same. Surrender.

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Living with Kids While in the D/s Lifestyle

Having kids can be a challenge in this lifestyle but I do recommend being honest with them at some point in their life. They deserve to come to this knowledge just as much as other things in this life. What they choose to do with said knowledge should be up to them.

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Why The Prince Charming Dominant Doesn't Exist

It's funny to me to see people wanting a Dominant but then looking for "chemistry" as well. They want to fall in love with the Dominant of their dreams. Apparently, these submissives have come into the lifestyle thinking that a Dominant is BDSMs version of Prince Charming. Ladies, He simply doesn't exist either in the Vanilla world or in the lifestyle. Most Doms I know have regular lives to live and when their backside itches they scratch it. They fart when they eat beans and burp when they drink a beer. They wake up with bags under their eyes and a 5 o'clock shadow just exactly like their vanilla counterparts. But here we are hoping like crazy that he will forever and ever look like a hottie in leathers while always having a desire to flog our submissive little behinds.

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Orgasm Control: Learning How to Ask for an Orgasm

In D/s sexuality one of the more common rules is that the Dominant controls the orgasms and sexual release of the submissive. Some require that the submissive not even touch themselves without the say so of the Dominant. In this style of power exchange it is familiar territory that the submissive will learn how to ask for an orgasm whether in or outside of a scene.

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Some Thoughts on Domestic Service from a Male Submissive

When luna indicated that she was going to emphasize domestic service at the Sub Guide this month, it reminded me that when I tell people I am primarily a service submissive I am frequently asked: “What is that?”. The follow-up question is often, “What do you get out of that?” It seemed an opportune time to tackle these questions. (Sometimes the follow-up question is “What are you secondarily, then?” To which I always reply, “Whatever She needs me to be, of course.”)

So what is a service submissive? Simply put, it’s a sub (male or female) that takes care of household chores and similar tasks. Cooking, cleaning and other domestic duties might be performed by a service submissive. We essentially take the role of butler, maid, chauffeur, gardener or cook.

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Changing for Master While Honoring and Maintaining Ourselves

The role of the Dominant is to provide a safe environment for the sub to express his or her submissiveness and be able to grow. The role of the sub is to provide a safe environment for the Dominant to express His or Her Dominance and be able to grow.

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Using Your Fear for Better Submissive Growth

Just because we have fears doesn't mean we have to let the fears dictate our actions or responses. This means we need to be vigilant with our emotions. By this I don't mean controlling them, it is important to feel negative emotions as well as positive ones, we don't want to repress our negative emotions but rather be aware of them and how they can affect us.

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What's That Sound? Discreet BDSM Play and Hiding Toys from Children

Taking precautions when it comes to the noises that can come from play when you have kids in the home.

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Ornamental Value: A Reflection on My Submissive Style

Living with my Dom for a longer period of time has allowed us to develop some rough routines and expectations that we’ll continue to develop as time progresses, and these have begun to help me form answers to the questions that I’ve been asking on and off from the beginning of my submission.

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Why BDSM and Tantric Massage Are a Match Made in Heaven

The fusing of BDSM and tantric massage has taken sexual energy to greater heights, and for many, it’s an experience that’s more satisfying than anything encountered before.

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