Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles. This could be in the form of giving commands, refusing requests or moving to control the location of impacts during play. Generally, it is frowned upon to try to force the Dominant’s hand to do something they do not wish to do.
Read The Series | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarIf you’ve just started out in BDSM and have asked a few questions, it is very likely that you have been directed to use a checklist to become familiar with what you may or may not like in play and roles and fetishes.A checklist can be very helpful for you when you are first starting out. You can learn what you might like to try and get answers to things you don’t know about. Some of the more detailed checklists can seem overwhelming but please realize that you don’t have to like everything. Pick and choose and be honest.
Read The Series | Find SimilarThere are 3 things I'd like to focus on in this post. What your ideal relationship is, the structure you'd like to have and the level of protocol you dream of having. This works for kinky bedroom relationships and also full-time dynamics. Get out pen and paper because what we are going to do is make a map of our ideal relationship.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI'd like to showcase several of these posts from the last year of Submissive Guide.
Read The Article | Find SimilarTolerance will grow in time, and will change. Most of the fun in exploring bdsm is in trying new things together, nobody can have everything thrown at them on day one.
Read The Article | Find SimilarA foot fetish is not necessarily related to submission, although for many guys the two combine well and there are a whole lot of varieties of activities and preferences for guys with a foot fetish.
Read The Article | Find SimilarYelling at them may seem like the thing to do, but with the right tools and a dash of inner strength, you can learn how to express yourself without blowing your top.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI'm going to cover the basics of protocol, some different types of protocol and then talk about how to develop your own protocol in your relationship.
Read The Article | Find SimilarToday and every day this Winter, I want to focus on healing and on joy.
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