The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.
Read The Series | Find SimilarWants and needs are very important to any relationship. When you start to understand who you are as a submissive, it’s time to figure out what you are looking for in a relationship. The difference between wants and needs can be answered in one basic question. Is this something you can live without?
Read The Series | Find SimilarThere are several other names that can be 'classed' for the submissive role in a relationship. The ones I'm covering here are the basics. I am well aware of toys, pets, sluts, servants and many many other names. Please do not feel that I am not leaving you out, but for the sake of clarity and simplicity, I am covering only Bottom, Masochist, Submissive and Slave.
Read The Article | Find SimilarYou may also be asked to show your obedience to your Dominant in a position of humble service. One of the ways you can do this is with a pose of worship. I'm going to describe two basic ways you can show your obedience and worship. Please feel free to try your own; as with all of the positions expressed here, they are customizable and definitely personal to each relationship.
Read The Article | Find SimilarI've read recently on a forum where a submissive is explaining her life and how she struggles with one thing or another. Someone commented that they must not be submissive enough and that opened the gateway for competition. From people saying that they wouldn't behave that way, or a good submissive would do this or that it's all saying (even if it might not be true) that I'm better than you are because I know the answer. As if there were just one answer to begin with.
Read The Article | Find SimilarHow many times have you heard a submissive say how he/she loves to be told they are a "good girl/boy" by their dominant? Yet how many times have any of them been able to pin point the why of the effect it has on them? I have a theory.
Read The Article | Find SimilarBad manners or exceptional manners will ALWAYS get attention while acceptable ones may go unnoticed.
Read The Article | Find SimilarIn a BDSM context, it’s more common to have to learn how to address someone than in a non-scene situation.
Read The Article | Find SimilarIt’s hard sometimes to open up and talk about what’s going on. Yes, it is much easier for one party to just assume that the other party knows what’s going on when in reality; they don’t even have a clue. How is a slave’s Master to know that the slave is struggling with keeping in the mindset they need unless the slave speaks up?
Read The Article | Find SimilarGenerally speaking, the first time you encounter someone in a BDSM context you will likely have to introduce yourself. We’ve all heard that you only get one chance to make a first impression to make sure it’s a good one.
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