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What Traditional Submissives can Learn from Hypnosis Fetishists

The hypnosis fetish, however, is relatively new. And because of its newness, traditional submissives sometimes dismiss hypnosis as unnecessary or a cheat. But hypnofetishists have learned a lot about sex and relationships in the past twenty years. And traditionalists could learn something from us: the importance of rapport.

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Why SSC and RACK Are Both Important Safety Acronyms to Know

The mantra “Safe, Sane, Consensual” (SSC) is probably one of the first things that someone new to the scene learns. RACK stands for two principles designed to give you the opportunity to move outside of your current comfort zones, into a place of interest.

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The Basics of Negotiating a BDSM Scene

Negotiating play is vital for new players or for those who have never played together. Once you get to know someone it is likely that unless you have something you'd really like to experience you can forego some negotiation for spontaneity.

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Showing Face: How Time Has Changed ThisGirl's Perceptions of Sharing Photos Online

For a long time though I really was not comfortable with showing my face in any fetish pictures since i was partly worried about the risk of being outed and also because I wanted to be anonymous within the scene as well.

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When You Can't Get Away: Follow Up to Submissive PMS

Answering some reader questions after the Submissive PMS video.

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Submissive and Slave: A Personal View

Some say the difference between a submissive and a slave has nothing whatever to do with how much control one gives up or how submissive one is. That it's in one's actions. In the way the slave obeys without question or hesitation. In the respect in the slave's voice when he or she speaks with his or her owner. In the way the slave knows what the owner needs almost before the owner does. But I've known some submissives to show their dominants more respect than some slaves show their owners.

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Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of a Predator Dom/me Part 2

Once you start in training you have a better chance to evaluate your new Dom/me. Is the Dom creating a positive learning environment, or does s/he make you feel that you are constantly failing his/her orders? Was it really a newbie mistake, or is there a lack of training that is causing the failure? Submission can easily set up a feeling of need and dependency on the Dom/me.

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What FetLife Has Done To Change The Kink Community

FetLife, for as long as it remains a free community will always be the place I recommend novices go to lurk in the groups and feed off of information that they get there. It is the largest no-nonesense group of people I've seen. FetLife has changed the community atmosphere. It really has. Better or worse is personal opinion, but I know that for me it has a lot going for it. As it ages I think it will get more refined with the quality instead of just quantity. I'll be there to see it age. Hopefully you will join me there.

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Processing Pain in Play: Positive Pain Management Techniques

Part of your receiving is also an exchange for the top. They want to watch you process that pain in open and positive ways so that they can get energy from it. I guess you could call a good sadist as an energy vampire along those lines.

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More Red Flags for Everyone - Personal Safety and Warnings

Everyone’s safety is extremely important of course, but in the BDSM community, it is the people who give themselves up the most that have a greater chance of being hurt; submissives.

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