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Content related to "When Kinky isn't Sexy"

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Hard and Soft Limits? The Sooner You Know About Them The Better

As a submissive, one of the first things you will be asked by almost every Dom/me is: what are your limits? You will encounter this sometimes in chat, in play, and when negotiating a relationship with a new Dom/me. If you are playing with a new Dom/me and aren’t asked this question, my advice is not to play with the person. I have heard Dom/mes say that They don’t play with safe words or limits because They know what They are doing. How can a Dom/me know if you have health issues or triggers or are just plain terrified of something unless you tell them?

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Thoughts on Public Vanilla Acceptable Collars

Does one know how to obtain collars that do not look like collars..so one can be worn at all time with out so called vanilla’s asking about it…?

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The Best Books for a Novice Submissive

There are a lot of books out there related to BDSM and being a novice submissive.

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Empowerment, Not Exploitation: Women Activists are Wrong About the Kink Community

I am a submissive. I have never felt exploited in any way. In fact, I feel empowered. I feel empowered in a way I have never felt before.

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Getting Over Your Fears to Talk About Your Newfound Kinky Desires

Once you know why you are afraid to talk to your partner you can work to relieve that stress because communication is so very important to your relationship. You can't control how they will respond, but at least you will be confident in your approach.

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Beyond Limits: The Illusion of Safety

The only true limitations are those fundamental values that you carry at your core. The inviolate lines that you will not cross for to do so you believe would compromise who you believe yourself to be. That final line in the sand.

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Things Have Changed and I Feel Insecure In My Relationship

Advice for a submissive who is feeling lost and insecure in their relationship when the sex life changes. Kayla tackles this really difficult topic.

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BDSM and Kids: How Your Kink May Change Over the Years

like a non-kinky relationship, your desire for and ability to have sex will change through the different stages of parenting. Don’t worry or freak out. Realize this is normal, and if you’re determined to enjoy as much kink as possible, get creative and be patient with yourself and your partner.

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What Should I Try Next: Like Spanking? Try Flogging

Spanking is another starting point for many people entering the BDSM arena because it is so simple (seeming) and if using your hand pretty difficult to spank your way to injury. Flogging is one of the most standard of BDSM impact tools and a great next step for those looking to take things to the next level.

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BDSM How To: Wax Play

A fantastic little how to get started with Wax Play! Important points include candle temperature and what you need to get going with your own scene.

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