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The Formal Collar

The Formal Collar is offered by the Dominant with the intent to formalize the bond and attachment between themselves and their submissive. It is a recognition of commitment, deep emotional feelings, devotion, mutual respect, and consideration. It expresses a belief that the Dominant and submissive share similar ideals and a genuine and growing desire to share each other’s lives over perhaps the rest of their lives.

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Submissive on Your Own Terms: Analyzing The One True Way

There are those who believe that there is only one way to be submissive. Mistress Steel challenges those thoughts with critical thinking, to open up the idea that submission is personal and varied.

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For Male Submissives

While this site is predominantly written by and for female submissives, a lot of what we write about can apply to male submissives too. But there are topics that are specific to male submissives and relationships where the male is submissive and we’ve curated them into a single collection for you here.

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Submissive Positions

Submissive Positions are talked about all over like everyone is supposed to be doing them or something. Not every relationship is set up to provide that level of protocol and you should never expect a relationship to automatically have that. If you are interested in positions, ask your partner or prospective partner if they’d be interested before you go learning any. They may have preferences to how you should look and act. Following them is by far more important than learning about positions online (unless that is their direction).

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Domestic Service

Whilst it’s every submissive’s prerogative to make their own decisions for how they will take care of the home and manage a budget – I’d like to be a part of giving submissives a boost (or a kick in the butt) and hopefully in the process give them motivation and practical know how to get their home and life more in order and reaching their service potential.So we’ll be revisiting some old homecare tips, coming up with some new ones and hopefully will all improve in our domestic service as a result.

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Sub v. Slave: A Second Opinion

To me there is quite a difference between being submissive and a slave. A submissive retains the power over themselves and their body. Many are not going to agree with me on this. I don't feel that discipline, true discipline should be put in place with a sub. If a submissive still has power over themselves then how can they really mess up to the point of punishment outside of play. Slaves on the other hand, particularly those who live it 24/7 sometimes need punishment just for the sake of training, being kept in line and as a reminder of their place.

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Psychological Aspects of Consensual Rape in BDSM Scenarios

"Consensual rape." Quite an oxymoron, I suppose. Rape, by definition, is sexual intercourse in which one party is unwilling and unwanting of the attention and act. A consensual act is something quite contrary to that initial concept of rape. A consensual act is one in which all parties are in agreement as to the parameters, activities, and boundaries of said act. How then, does the term "consensual rape" have any validity at all?

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Understanding Sub Fever

Figuring out what to do once you know you have it can be difficult. Novice submissives lose their rational thought really easily when the fever takes hold.

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Why I Could Never Return to a Vanilla Relationship

We are the sum of our experiences, after all, and if I hadn't learned these lessons I don’t think I’d be where I am today.

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Some Issues with Consensuality

As in most things, the meaning of consent is far from simple.

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