Many of the things we do when it comes to BDSM and D/s relationships seem to come faster than in a traditional relationship, so often we forget that the base of a D/s relationship is a traditional one. You are still two people that plan to cohabitate. With that comes decisions and plans, change and adjustment periods.
In the first list of tips, I want to give I'm going to cover the more basic 'vanilla' ideas that will make your submissive more comfortable as they move into your home. The second list is BDSM based tips that will hopefully start your relationship on a good footing now that you are living under the same roof.
Read The Article | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarIt's funny to me to see people wanting a Dominant but then looking for "chemistry" as well. They want to fall in love with the Dominant of their dreams. Apparently, these submissives have come into the lifestyle thinking that a Dominant is BDSMs version of Prince Charming. Ladies, He simply doesn't exist either in the Vanilla world or in the lifestyle. Most Doms I know have regular lives to live and when their backside itches they scratch it. They fart when they eat beans and burp when they drink a beer. They wake up with bags under their eyes and a 5 o'clock shadow just exactly like their vanilla counterparts. But here we are hoping like crazy that he will forever and ever look like a hottie in leathers while always having a desire to flog our submissive little behinds.
Read The Article | Find SimilarSometimes those around me can't tell the difference between my mental illness and an actual emotional problem. I do my best to reassure those around me that it's really not them, it's me. And I'm not always successful. And they often do more reassuring than I do. But without knowing the underlying cause, and figuring out how to avoid it, I'm kinda stuck. So that's something I'm working on.
Read The Article | Find SimilarTaking precautions when it comes to the noises that can come from play when you have kids in the home.
Read The Article | Find SimilarEven though we can’t always spend our days chained to the bed or sitting at our owner’s feet, there’s always a way to still show your submission in the vanilla world.
Read The Article | Find SimilarMeet Oxytocin, the human bonding hormone, and natural relationship superglue.
Read The Article | Find SimilarHe's hesitant to continue the discussion on rules he would like for me to follow due to the fact that punishment for these rules would be hard due to lack of privacy. Any suggestions about discreet punishments?
Read The Article | Find SimilarI understand. You don't know anybody there. There are about a bajillion worst case scenarios that your brain has conjured up ever since you first desired to head out into the local community.
Read The Article | Find SimilarAs a kinkster, there’s a chance that, eventually, they’ll see or hear something and ask you about it. You’ve answered questions about poop, penises, and what those ducks were doing to one another in the park (or was that just me?). You’ve got this.
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