The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.
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Knife and Blood play, as you can probably guess, comes with a lot of intrinsic danger - so before embarking in this type of play, you need to make sure that you have an adequate safety kit ready.
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You should never fear using your safeword. There are ways to deal with the guilt, disappointment, fear, sense of failure for using your safeword and the failing to use your safeword at all that many of us feel at one time or another.
Read The Article | Find SimilarNot long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.
Read The Series | Find SimilarIf you’ve just started out in BDSM and have asked a few questions, it is very likely that you have been directed to use a checklist to become familiar with what you may or may not like in play and roles and fetishes.A checklist can be very helpful for you when you are first starting out. You can learn what you might like to try and get answers to things you don’t know about. Some of the more detailed checklists can seem overwhelming but please realize that you don’t have to like everything. Pick and choose and be honest.
Read The Series | Find SimilarEvery submissive I know, including myself, hate to get into trouble, but it's going to happen. We have to admit that there will be times of backsliding, pushing limits and general disobedience in our learning. It's a part of growth. Don't think of punishment as something bad, but as something to help us grow inward.
Read The Article | Find SimilarBeing a single submissive preparing for a relationship is just about as much work as those of us in relationships. Personal development should be your main focus. I have six very important tasks that should help you prepare for a happy future.
Read The Article | Find SimilarWe more experienced people do have a habit of looking at new people funny when they don't know what they are into. I think we forget that we were there once, that we floundered and stuttered when asked if we liked bondage or spanking, or if we were a Dominant or submissive. So, hopefully, we'll learn from this little article too - that we were there once.
Read The Article | Find SimilarHow do I figure out exactly what it is that I expect in a BDSM relationship?
Read The Article | Find SimilarLet me tell you what you can do to make sure you are better informed before you enter a relationship and shortly after you've found a Dominant to submit to so your question of what is expected of you can be answered as fully as possible.
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