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Content related to "Why Rules Provide Structure to D/s (and M/s) Relationships"

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Grappling with Tradition and History to Define 24/7 Long Term D/s Relationships

Not so simply, it usually means the desire for lifetime commitment or a relationship with many or most of the same attributes that are familiar to all of us in its vanilla counterpart - the marriage.

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Introducing BDSM to Your Partner

It is a scary proposition to approach your partner who may be oblivious to your new desires about wanting to add a bit or a lot of kink to your relationship. Whatever they decide it’s up to you on how you proceed. If they want to give it a try – go ahead! If they are far from interested you still have avenues available to you. It doesn’t automatically mean the end of the relationship.

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Limits

Limits are personal boundaries that everyone places for how far they are willing to take things. These limits can be sexual, personal, emotional or otherwise. You may even have some for your every day that you don’t realize are limits. If you don’t have any BDSM experience, the idea of setting up limits can be challenging. Let’s dive into what they are, how to figure them out and why you make sure they are respected.

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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BDSM Checklists

If you’ve just started out in BDSM and have asked a few questions, it is very likely that you have been directed to use a checklist to become familiar with what you may or may not like in play and roles and fetishes.A checklist can be very helpful for you when you are first starting out. You can learn what you might like to try and get answers to things you don’t know about. Some of the more detailed checklists can seem overwhelming but please realize that you don’t have to like everything. Pick and choose and be honest.

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Managing Depression as a Submissive and How Your Dominant Can Help

Everyone has gone through bouts of depression at one time or another. For some, it's practically debilitating and others can handle it in stride without much of a bat of the eyelashes. I recently recovered from a long time depression with the help of medications and my Dominant's caring. It's never an easy process, but being reminded that your submission is still desired can help.

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What You Need To Know About Using Contracts to Negotiate a Relationship

In a D/s relationship, it is not unfamiliar to also draft a contract in which to declare your intentions with each other. These are not required, of course, and some people will proclaim the invalidity of these documents to anyone who will listen. I feel that the creation of a contract has some very useful and valuable importance to a growing relationship.

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The Bare Necessities of a Total Power Exchange Relationship

What do I absolutely have to have in order for my submission to him to be fulfilling and rewarding? What makes our relationship work after 6 years and with no hint of failing?

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The Returning a Collar After a Break Up

I decided to return the collar with the same regard in which it was presented. Traditionally, a collar is offered with a great deal of significance for the persons and the relationship they share. But in the heat of emotion, we may not think to return one in the same reverent manner which it was accepted. So, I took it upon myself to rise above the childish feelings I could have so easily resorted to.

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...And Along Came Baby: Parenting and Submission

When I found out that I was pregnant, many people just assumed that we would drop the majority of our lifestyle to focus on family rearing. Nothing could be further from the truth!

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