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BDSM vs Abuse

The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.

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A Non-Romantic BDSM Relationship, Is It Wise?

Do you think it is wise to approach D/s as a non-romantic exchange, or am I just fooling myself? Do you have any advice on how I can remain focused in this kind of arrangement?

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An Open Letter to Everyone Who Wants to Know What a D/s Relationship is Supposed to Look Like

When people ask me what a D/s relationship is like, my first thought is that it is 'like any other relationship,' but that's not entirely accurate. Let me tell you what the common misconceptions are and then we can talk about the reality of a D/s relationship. You may be surprised to learn that they aren't as foreign as you think.

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An Overview of 1950's Head of Household Style Power Exchange

I believe many people in the BDSM world see any Male-dominated/female-followed (M/f) power exchange dynamic as being inherently 1950's. This simply isn't the case. So what is, exactly, the 1950's kink all about?

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A Personal Look at Daddy/Little Girl Relationships

melly takes us into her dynamic and explores her Ageplay Relationship with her partner. She explains how it has enhanced her relationship and what rituals she has in place for her own submission.

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A Primer on Pet Play and Human Pets

Pet play is one of the most unique, one of the least known and in my opinion one of the most fun and entertaining sub-cultures in the BDSM, D/s and “kink” lifestyle. Now, I write this from the perspective of a submissive female, so please keep in mind that it can be changed around to any form you want.

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Are Discipline and Punishment The Same?

Discipline and Punishment. The words are far from the same however some dynamics treat them the same. In fact, for the longest time, I have used the word punishment when I mean discipline. It’s even possible that Master has used these words interchangeably as well. I’ve done some thinking to try to sort out what these two words mean in our dynamic and how they are employed. I have a preference for clearly defined terms and boundaries so these two words are worth defining.

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Are Dominants Supposed to Act This Way?

Kayla helps a troubled submissive in an abusive relationship.

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Are D/s Relationships Better than Vanilla Ones?

We feel superior to our vanilla counterparts at times. But, in truth, D/s relationships are no better or worse than vanilla ones.

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Are Female Dominants More About Mental Dominance Than Physical Dominance?

Since I’m writing from the male submissive point of view, I suppose this question might also be asked as, “Is male submission more mental than physical?” I find the question, no matter how you parse it, to be interesting largely because it’s something I never really considered before. I suppose the implied idea is that the female dominants somehow exert their control vis-à-vis more cerebral or psychological means whereas the men tend toward more physical means.

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Are Relationships Not Worth Working On? How a Recent Challenge Brought Out The Disposable Relationship Mentality

The lack of effort in relationships is a startling reality in today's gotta-have-it-now society. Perhaps I'm old school or old fashioned but what I'm seeing in today's society, and not just the BDSM culture, is the lack of effort in relationships. As I was raised I was taught that something worthwhile wasn't always easy to achieve and you may have to work hard to get it.

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