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The Formal Collar

The Formal Collar is offered by the Dominant with the intent to formalize the bond and attachment between themselves and their submissive. It is a recognition of commitment, deep emotional feelings, devotion, mutual respect, and consideration. It expresses a belief that the Dominant and submissive share similar ideals and a genuine and growing desire to share each other’s lives over perhaps the rest of their lives.

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When Fantasy Collides with Reality: Weighing Expectations when Exploring Kink Fantasies

Unrealistic expectations and desires are some of the most difficult challenges faced by those who are experienced in the lifestyle when dealing with those just entering the lifestyle. In many ways we each buy into a particular ‘aspect’ of the fantasy. Yet over and over people try to implement the impossible.

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5 Ways to Make Long Distance Relationships Work For You

Long-distance relationships (LDR) of any sort have always had negative press reviews and I'm sure all of us have heard the, "they never work" response at some point in time. Lifestyle LDR has even more negative connotations as people harp on the inability to fully submit/dominate from a distance. I'm here to tell you that they can work. They have worked. You just have to make it work. Anything worth having is never easy to achieve and both parties have to really want it.

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Processing Pain in Play: What Can Interrupt or Block Pain Processing?

If you've experienced anything like I have, there are moments where you just can't change the pain response to anything beyond pain. What normally feels really good is just not. There are a number of things that can block your ability to translate the pain.

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What is a Fetish?

We use the term fetish to describe many actions or conditions which appear with relative prevalence within the BDSM communities.

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Defining Sub Space

Mistress Steel breaks down the many levels of subspace, as she sees them, and how to navigate them in play.

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Recognizing Sub Rebound (Sub Drop)

Submissive Rebound is often called sub-drop. Here are some ways you can recognize it in you.

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What is Aftercare?

Most often we associate this term with the time frame immediately following a 'scene'. However, this term is equally applicable at many other points and times and many times is not associated with BDSM or D/s at all.

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Submissive Myths: Submission is a Result of Childhood Abuse

If a human being at some point in their childhood becomes the focus of physical and/or sexual abuse does this then turn them into a submissive at some later point in their lives?

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Altered Mental States

The human mind is vulnerable to suggestion. Within the BDSM community, there is a strong underlying foundation for voluntarily focused enthrallment.

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