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Content related to "Establishing a Safe, Trusting Environment for Talk"

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Lessons in Submissive Speech

Not long after my first step into the real world of BDSM I learned of a phrase that to this day has no real definition that I can pin to it. That phrase is “speaking submissively.” To me, there is no way to speak submissively that isn’t also speaking respectfully and with deference. Many other people speak the same way in situations that call for it, like in front of a judge or to the president for instance.But I still get questions about how a submissive is supposed to say x, y and z so I thought that I’d do my best to convey what I think would work in a variety of circumstances so that if the occasion arises that you need to “speak submissively” you’ll have something you can say.

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Dirty Talk

When someone says “Talk dirty to me baby…” in the bedroom the hopefully-soon-to-be dirty talker instantly freezes like a soaking wet roll of toilet paper being thrown out of an igloo in Antarctica.What should you say? What do they want you to say? What if you say too much? What if you say too little?

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BDSM vs Abuse

The core of BDSM is consent. No one will disagree with this. We are all aware, hopefully, that abuse is not consensual. If you feel that what is going on is ‘not right’ then you certainly should investigate if it is abuse or not. Some of what you may feel could not be abuse at all, but it’s good to know for sure. Learn how you can see the differences for yourself.

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Exploring Submission Online: The Very Real Truths Behind the Keyboard

Exploring submission online is a growing reality. Chat networks, IRC chat rooms and websites developed for real-time fantasy all have areas where the D/s subculture thrives online. They have developed online protocols, rituals, belief systems and several new words the enhance the fantasy online.

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What Is Slave Training?

The important thing to remember with slave training is that is it an agreed upon change or set of changes that the submissive undergoes to improve themselves for their Dominant or themselves. You do not have to be in a relationship to undergo training. You just have to have a desire to better yourself.

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What Happens At Your First Munch?

So you are ready to venture into the great wide expanse of public life and meet people face to face. That's great! A munch is a safe and fun environment to do that in. A munch is a meet and greet of kinky folks in a public to semi-private space where you can get to know people, talk and ask questions and just enjoy feeling good about who you are without having to hide anything.

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I Found a Munch, Now What?

Some tips for getting out to a munch on the right foot.

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5 Things to Give Your Safe Call Person Before You Go On That Kinky Date

Remember, this person is your "just in case" person. It's extremely unlikely they will ever have to use the information but it's important. So what information is important for your safe call person to have?

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You've Been a Bad Submissive: Learn How to Atone and Forgive Yourself

As a submissive, it's hard to not beat yourself up over being unintentionally disobedient. I've been known to mope around for days after I've been in trouble; basically still punishing myself - even though the punishment is complete. Punishment is so that when it's complete you can move on with a clear slate. So, how do you cure that post-infraction funk?

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Dealing With Anger As a Submissive

Everyone handles anger and frustration differently, but I think most would agree that the best way to deal with anger is to cool off before saying or doing something you will regret later on.

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